All that hype for just one day! Now the countdown is really on..

MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Okay so its a few days late but its been a hectic 3 days man!
I literally have not stopped! Currently sat in bed writing this. I am fully aware that its 1.36pm but I'm catching up on chill out time so do not judge me!
But Christmas is effectively over...now the countdown to the big day is on. I couldn't be more petrified..
So Christmas this year was really important to me as its my last one here for a year, so I wanted it to go according to plan...thank god it didn't snow!
Saw the mother and nan on Christmas eve for some lunch and then trekked up to Warwick to see the brother and sister-in-law and niece and nephew...ended up going to watch a nativity play at the local church where my niece, Evie, was christened. I'm all for things like that...they're usually quite cute and comical to watch but usually short too...this was not! A whole HOUR we spent there! Too much for my liking!
Then Sam and I dressed up in Santa outfits and met some mates in town to bring in Christmas Day. All in all, a really good day but so tiring!
Spent Christmas Day at my Aunties with my Grandparents and Dad and sister..such a lovely chilled out day...and the food?! My god! I'm still stuffed now!!!
Its really sad though as this could be one of the last times I see my Grandparents. The thought had crossed my mind when my sister dressed up as Santa and gave out the presents, highly hilarious I might add!, and also Dad mentioned it to me too. That sucks but that's life I guess :/
But I got pretty much everything I asked for...wow I sound like such a spoilt child!
But in fact, all i asked for was things for America such as diary's and address books and laptop cases etc. Got an awesome camera from the mother too! The exact one i wanted! Its one of the ones where you hold down the button and move it to the left and it takes a picture of the whole scene...its amazing! Spent all day playing with it!
And the best present? My best friend Tom is taking me to NEW YORK...flights, accommodation, the lot!! Also my 21st present but omg wow!
I fricking love that boy! I'm gonna miss him so so so dearly :(
I did yell at him for that too..Its way too much and I really don't deserve it.
Ben's gone home for Christmas :(
I don't mean to be sad and soppy but I really miss him. I cant believe hes not back till January 12th! Stupid skiing for his stupid 21st! :) It looks so amazing! I'm so jealous!
But I'm going down to Brighton to see him on Wednesday...literally cannot contain my excitement :) eeep!
Right better get my lazy bum out of bed and do something...clean the apartment whilst watching Xmas movies is what Ive settled on! Not going to even attempt going into town for shopping! I hate sales! Its like a fricking stampede!
I quite value my life thank you very much!

Disneyland Paris was just the warm up for the real thing!

So for my flatmates 21st birthday, I surprised her with tickets to Disneyland Paris for 3 days and its probably the best idea and best money I have ever spent on someone.
Granted its her Christmas present too and a little treat for me and her so we could chill and forget the turbulent 7 or so months we've had and also a marker to show how much she means to me and how much I will miss her when I'm gone.
Ive never needed a break away so much and it was defiantly worth it to see her so excited!
I booked it all aaaaages ago, even before my Disney interview...could you imagine if I hadn't gotten the job in Florida, how bittersweet it would have been to go to Paris and experience all I would have experienced?! So glad I got the job!
We went on Monday and got back today, only 3 days but that was defiantly long enough for us :)
These 3 days has given me an insight into what I'm gonna be doing and I don't think I could be any more excited!
But you know I've been struggling with not having it hit me that I'm leaving? Well on the coach back to the airport in Paris and chatting with Sam, it started to hit me then. Its the first real time we've sat together and talked about whats gonna happen with all of our stuff when we both move out of the flat..I actually got really freaked out..so i think its starting to hit me and as soon as Christmas is over, its gonna really start hitting...i can feel it already..
But Disney was incredible! Especially because its Christmas, it was so magical! I mean I know its supposed to be but come on..Disneyland in Paris...at Christmas...all the decorations and Christmas music?! Oh and it snowed! How amazing is that!
But my god...it was literally the coldest I have EVER been in my life...Ive never worn as many layers as I have these past 3 days!
And the food? My god...buffets and fast food galore...NIGHTMARE! I am literally not gonna eat for a week! The amount I consumed could probably feed a whole community for a week! Not even kidding!
I got Sam slightly into the Disney channel...love it! I love the Disney channel :D yeah...I'm slightly worried too!
I'm so glad that I'm working in the Florida Disney though...I could not cope with the sub zero temperatures in France in the winter!
Anyways I think my bed is calling...I'm so tired and cannot focus any longer! Am also being thrown straight back into work again...starting with a 9.30am-10pm shift tomorrow...Nice.
Better get some shut eye! Night!

'why are you jumping around? its only post?' 'DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT THIS IS?!'

IT CAME! IT FINALLY CAME!
Finally have my packet from Disney :)
The best bit of post I have received all year! Its so shiny and pretty!
Literally jumped on the spot when I saw it this morning...Sam was like...erm..Claire, its just post...! Hell no its not! I've been waiting for this for aaaaages!
So glad I didn't see it last night otherwise I'd have been up for hours with it!
But its headed with a little picture of Mickey next to my address...its so cool!

Today has got to be probably the hardest day Ive had in a while..
My mother decided it was probably about the right time to visit me and see where I work...for the first time...been there 2 years and pretty much all of my family have been...says something no?
I'm stood behind the bar, doing all my bits and bobs and all I can hear is her going on and on, always talking, never a moments silence.
Now I know where I get it from but I hope I'm not THAT extreme, to the point where my company looks bored at me droning on about complete nonsense!
Ben's said its a good quality to have and he likes that I talk alot, but come on..sometimes I wonder if hes like oh Claire, just please shut up! wouldn't surprise me really! there are times when hes had to shut me up! :) probably like right now...I'm rambling..
My point is, to have someone who's relationship with you is more than strained, break down in tears on you when you say goodbye, is quite a tough thing to handle. I'm not the best when it comes to family emotion...I don't know why that is..I usually just freeze and make some sort of pathetic, unneeded comment which doesn't help the situation, but I literally just stood there and hugged her and told her not to cry...how weak is that? that I didn't know what to say to comfort my own mother..
I think she's realising that actually the way shes acted is not right and the consequence is that her own kids are distanced so much from her, they don't really make the effort and want to see her...wow that sounds awful on my part.
Ive never asked for anything from my mother..well from like the age of 14 maybe 15, because I knew I wouldn't get it. not in a spoilt brat kinda way. But in the my mother doesn't really contribute now that my parents are divorced way, so I stopped asking.
but for her to give me money towards America, literally left me speechless..I would never have expected that in a million years..I'm still shell shocked.
I'm guessing she's realised and is attempting to make up for lost time?

I go to Disneyland Paris on Monday! I'm SO excited! Its a trip for Sam, my flatmates, birthday and her Christmas present and a kind of last big thing that we'll do together before I leave. We both need a break...defiantly long overdue and I'm so excited that its just me and her!
Yeah its gonna be cold but come on...its DISNEY!
I was thinking...how bittersweet would it have been if I didn't get this job with Disney?! I'd have literally wanted to die whilst I was there! but this makes it so amazing!
I'll be able to say Ive been to Disney twice in 2 months and 2 different locations!
But every holiday never comes without its bumps...Tom booked my flights but booked depart Tuesday and come back Wednesday, when Ive booked everything for Monday come back Wednesday! Doh!
Never leave vital details like that to a man! :)
I asked him to do it in the first place because I so would have done it completely wrong! So glad its not my fault! But got it all sorted and we are flying from London Luton on Monday now! Cannot wait!
I so so so sooo hope we do not get any snow blizzards to the extreme of the past few weeks like up north has seen! touch wood!

I thought time only flew by when you were having fun?

60 Days.
2 months.
1440 hours until I leave. Yeah i just googled that.
Where the hell has time gone? I feel like I haven't had enough time to take it all in. Like i need more time, But I'm desperate to go...? Whats up with that?
4350 miles. 7000 kilometers. The distance between home and Florida. Oh. My. God.

My packs are still to come :(
I want them so much! Its been more than 5 weeks right?
But Hannah did say that their waiting for Disney for the acceptance letters, all of them..for every single person on the programme, and they'll then email when they're sending them as if they send half, the likes of facebook will show this and people who haven't received theirs, will be like but why haven't i gotten mine yet?! Makes sense really!
But the suspense is killing me! I wanna see it!
Ben's like omg...you haven't got your visa started yet?! Yeah...i know Ben...thanks for that!
Slightly worried!
Why have i just found this person? shittiest timing Claire! As per usual really. Oh well.
Life is what you make it, take risks and chances when they present themselves and live for the moment, otherwise you'll regret it if you don't.
I don't regret this.
He means alot. I'm glad I took that chance.
My boy <3